Season II: Liz

I had known Nolan for roughly a year before I met Liz. He introduced us. It was the beginning of spring and the air was charged with that undeniable energy--I hadn't been able to resist the urge to make trouble for myself and seek out the boy I was crushing on.

From the beginning Liz and I hit it off. She was a tall, pretty blond with a huge personality and a charm that wore away my hesitant exterior. Before the end of the afternoon, she and I had ditched out Nolan and were adventuring around campus.

As the season wore out and the next year began, I ended up spending more time with Liz than I did with Nolan. She was easy to talk to, and since we both knew Nolan, he was typically the topic of conversation. She knew everything about my interaction with him: She knew about the late night walk after I was rear ended; she knew about the little ways he bothered me; she knew that I wanted to be with him. And all along, she never told me about the walks she took with him. She never told me about the crush she had on him. She never told me about all of the time they spent together in band. I didn't know to ask. She was starting a relationship with the boy who delivered her first kiss. And, while he was abroad in Australia, things seemed to be good between them. He was all she wanted to talk about when I brought up the Nolan bit.

When I found out that she and Nolan had started dating, it was a punch in the stomach. Not only did it remind me of the Janelle/Adam experience, but it also resonated with so much dishonesty.
I saw her a few times after that, but I never really made the effort to offer the friendship I had shared with her before. I didn't see the point. I had lost a friend--to a person I had ripped open a slice of my heart to let in.
I stopped bumping into Liz around the end of my junior year. I didn't make an effort to avoid her, I just didn't run in the same circles, and she still lived on campus while I had ventured into the world of crappy college rentals.

The next time I saw Liz was at my sister's wedding rehearsal. While I tried not to let it bother me, I acted the fool at the rehearsal, poking jokes, playing up what Nolan had missed out on. She sat awkwardly in the back of the church. At the reception dinner I somehow came up. She couldn't even remember my name.

Later that night, while I drank away the discomfort of my speech and a slew of people I wanted nothing to do with, they danced together. I felt nothing for him.